The Name Game, an ABC exercise

As you know, we are expecting a baby girl sometime in December. About a month ago, we went in for the twenty-week ultrasound appointment. The ultrasonographer and C's doctor were both almost certain that the new addition will be a girl.

Because we now know the gender, apparently we are supposed to be thinking of names. Everybody we meet asks us if we have picked a name yet.

"Can't you give us a little time?" I silently wonder? After all, we are barely half way there! But just about everybody asks us "the question" when they know the gender and find out how far along we are.

Dealing with this has been harder than I anticipated. From the very beginning, C and I decided that we didn't want to talk publicly about the names we liked or had chosen. For some reason, people seem to think that if the baby hasn't been born yet, then they can give whatever opinion they want about the name that you have selected.

Everybody, it seems, thinks that we care about their opinion.

Frankly, we don't. Not to be rude, but I'm not going to give my child a different name because your best friend in elementary school had a dog with the name we like.

Guess what? I don't care. We are going to pick the name that feels right and sounds right to us. Our neighbors, friends, and well-meaning relatives are invited to keep their opinions to themselves.

However, I can't come right out and say that to them. So instead, I found a way to deflect the question whenever it comes up. I decided to go through the alphabet, one letter at a time, and each day we will think of girl names that start with that letter. We started with the letter A, and today we are on the letter K. When people ask us what names we're thinking about, we say something like, "Well, today is a K day. What girl names do you like that start with K?"

I've found that this is a pretty good solution. It deflects the conversation away from us having to provide the names we like, and instead, we get to let people give their input on names they like instead. They can give their opinion on names without us having to be the ones who provided the fodder for analysis.

Judgement of the names is left to us, which we can do, in private. And in case you are wondering, there is a name or two that we like above the others. But I'm not going to tell you what it is. December will arrive, the baby will be born, and her name will be announced to the world. Once it is announced and attached to a beautiful baby girl, people will have to keep their dislike of the name to themselves. Until then, we welcome your suggestions.

Kindly remember, however, that today is a K day. And if you ask what names we like, we'll try to deflect the question so subtly that you don't even realize we've done it, unless we tell you about it. Like this post: a paragraph that starts with each letter used so far; discovering names with a new letter every day.