Sorry we've been a bit quiet over here. Things sure aren't quiet in real life!
Today I graduated with my Master of Arts degree!!!!!!!! I am so excited for this milestone. It has been a long road (sometimes quite bumpy), but one I would not trade for anything.
I am so happy and proud of the things that have happened these last few months. I think this picture about sums it up for me...
Some things I know with my head but don't always know with my heart (or show by my actions)...
1) Things always look better in the morning (though lately a few hours of sleep will do the trick).
2) I always feel better once I have gotten out of bed.
3) I am always happier when I do the chore instead of avoiding it by taking a "much needed" break.
4) As a parent, I can only influence by my actions and decisions, not guarantee.
I've been reading the most recent issue of Segullah, which is dedicated to the topic of our mortal tabernacles. The essays are thoughtful and inspiring. And so I have been thinking about bodies.
One of the things I think is most amazing about my physical body is what it has taught me about my spirit. I am able to understand the spiritual concepts that run parallel to hunger, feasting, being filled, etc. because of my bodily experiences.
When I was pregnant I remember being at times consumed with concern for the physical well-being of the child I was carrying. As I contemplated all the possibilities for physical impairment, it came to me that none of them matter, so long as the spirit remains healthy. That provided great comfort and strengthened my faith in an eternal purpose for life.
Now that Kiddo is here and healthy, I find myself very watchful of his physical well-being: I guard his naps, I watch for any signs of illness, I closely track his bodily functions. The question then arises: Am I (will I be) as careful with his spiritual health?
Will I guard his opportunities for feeling the spirit? Will I be aware of the symptoms of spiritual illness? Will I keep track of his spiritual growth?
I hope so.
Last night as we watched the news, a local news story showed store surveillance camera footage of a purse snatching caught on tape. Typically, such an occurrence wouldn't make the 10 o'clock news, but this one did because as the thief stole the purse, she was reprimanding a young child saying, "Get back here Chrissy! No. That is not yours."
Do as I say, not as I do, eh?
The video is astonishing, really. Here you have a young child, and presumably, her mother. While the mother is stealing somebody's purse, she is telling her child not to take what isn't hers.
Example is a powerful teacher. Much more powerful than words alone. This is just one case in point.
Do you ever stop wondering if your baby is breathing? Am I more paranoid than most parents, since Kiddo is now more than four months old and I still wonder if he is breathing in his crib?
Am I weird?
My guess is that this is still pretty normal for a first-time-dad of a 4-month-old. Then again, maybe it isn't and I'm an irrational freak. I can live with that.
In any case, my feelings of discomfort have heightened since Kiddo has started sleeping longer at night (some nights).
Last week there was a night when Kiddo ate and went to bed at about 7:30 PM. We didn't hear from him until around 3:30 AM. That was an eight hour stretch. I had to get up sometime after 1:00 to go into his room to make sure he was okay. Sure enough, he was just sleeping. I went back to bed convinced that he was seconds away from waking up, but he slept like two more hours.
When Kiddo was first born, I wasn't sure I could handle the stress of him waking up every couple of hours. Now I wonder if I can handle him sleeping through it!
The first post in this series
The second post in this series
I started into labor on a Thursday evening. DH and I taught a class that night together, which turned out to be really handy. First, it kept my mind occupied for a couple of hours. Second, there was a clock in the back of the classroom and that made it really easy to keep track of my contractions. By the time we left for the 40 minute drive home, they were about 5-6 minutes apart. I was kind of bummed because it was a week before my due date and I had just turned in my thesis the Monday of that week. That meant I had not yet done the other things I had wanted to do to prepare for Kiddo's birth: a haircut, an eyebrow wax, and a pedicure. So on the way home from our class we stopped for a late night haircut at a friend's house.
The contractions continued through the night and I felt in control of my body for all of that time. I use the relaxation techniques to stay on top of the contractions all through the next morning. Finally around noon, I decided to go to the hospital instead of to my pedicure appointment. I couldn't resist stopping off to have my eyebrows waxed on the way though.
I guess all that is a pretty good indication as to how well I was doing through early labor. Once at the hospital, they checked me in and decided this was it. After a bit I went ahead and used the CD track intended for labor (as opposed to preparation for labor). It was about an hour long and it really helped me to focus and shut off for a while. I got to use a spa tub and that helped as well.
Unfortunately, it was about this time that the nurse started showing concern that the baby wasn't responding like (s)he should. When she started talking about internal monitoring, I started to feel a bit of panic. I started to realize that we could end up having a C-section and I knew I would be much happier having already had the epidural in for that to happen. In addition, I was getting to a point where I felt I was barely handling the contractions and the thought of having my membranes ruptured artificially and the monitors inserted was more than I could handle. So I had the epidural put in.
Long story short, I did end up having a C-section, for which I am very grateful as it most likely saved our little boy's life.
Coming soon..."Final Reflections on a Hypnobabies birth".
The first post in this series
No joke -- just as finished my last post, the CD player (set to random) flipped over to a Hypnobabies CD left in there from before Kiddo's birth. In an instant, I was transported back to the weeks before Kiddo was born...
I decided rather late in my pregnancy to go the hypnobabies route, so my CDs came with the instruction to do two exercises a day. Each one lasted about 30 minutes which meant an hour of my day needed to go to the course. This was somewhat trying for me as I was working gangbusters on my thesis at the time and trying to complete it before Kiddo's birth. On the other hand, it was nice to have a planned time to relax.
So I dutifully began practice in relaxation and self-hypnosis. I did really well for the first few weeks. I was amazed at how good I got at relaxing and turning my body off. When the task turned from just relaxing to learning how to get up and walk around while in a self-hypnotized state,I kind of fell off of my practice schedule. I never really got well practiced in the later techniques, but I did get pretty good at relaxing and doing it very quickly.
I thought I had pretty good memories of the course, but when the CD came up after my last post, and I heard the voice of the guide and the start up music, I had a rush of odd emotions, not all of which were positive.
Up next..."How Hypnobabies Worked for Me"
At our first pre-natal visit for Kiddo, the Dr. asked three questions,
"Are you planning to breastfeed?"
"Are you planning on an epidural?"
"What are you plans for birth control after the baby?"
The third question really caught me off-guard. I mean, how far was that from my mind?
I had already decided to breastfeed if I could, but I wasn't really sure about the epidural thing. I had heard so many mixed opinions and ideas about it that I just wasn't sure.
Now my Dr. was great about supporting me in anything I decided to do, but he wasn't always great at providing information unless I asked for it. And me being me, I didn't really ask him about it until I had figured it out for myself.
After much research (and a blog post I really liked), we decided to go the self-hypnosis route. I felt kind of weird about it because I am one of the most skeptical people I know. But I thought it might be worth a shot.
I selected the Hypnobabies program after a not so helpful hospital class on natural methods. I felt good about it and DH was very supportive of the choice.
So was it a good choice? After secretly hoping for a birth like this one, I was interested to see how the whole thing turned out.
Stay tuned for the next installment... "Preparing for a Hypnobabies Birth" or "How I took an 35 minute nap each day and counted it for practice in labor".
We make a lot of assumptions about the people around us. Based on available information, we try to "figure out" the people around us. Last week, I was looking at our car through the eyes of a stranger (don't ask), and I saw some interesting things. I imagine that people make assumptions about us when they see our car.
The problem is, I bet that in many cases those assumptions are actually incorrect.
Let me explain. No, there is too much. Let me sum up.
Consider the following attributes (for lack of a better word) of our car.
Based on these attributes, you might make the following assumptions about the car owner(s):
If you made these assumptions about us, you'd be kind of correct. The truth is:
It is interesting to consider the false assumptions I'd make about myself if I were looking at my car from the outside. Chances are, I make similar false (and true) assumptions about people all the time.
That is, after all, why they are assumptions. Based on your life experience and the evidence at hand. Even if it is misleading.
On May 12, your "Inexperienced Parents" are taking Kiddo and together are participating in the 2007 Race for the Cure in Salt Lake City. Race for the Cure is a fundraiser to support finding a cure for breast cancer.
One in seven women will be stricken with breast cancer in her lifetime and the more we raise, the more the Komen Salt Lake City Race for the Cure® of the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation can give back to fund vital breast cancer education, screening and treatment programs in our own community and support the national search for a cure.
Please join us in the fight by pledging in support of our participation in the Race or contributing generously to Komen Salt Lake City. Your tax-deductible contribution will fund innovative outreach and awareness programs for medically underserved communities in Salt Lake City and national breast cancer research. It is easy to make a donation. Whatever you can give will help! We truly appreciate your support and will keep you posted on our progress.
Thank you so much for your time and support in the fight against breast cancer! Every step counts!
Stay tuned for updates as we get closer to race day!
